A guy sends me a message on Facebook and I reply quite softly because kindness has never killed a soul on this earth. We talk to the point of exchanging contacts. He was not even worth it though – and by worth it I mean someone you share interests with or you terribly like, because hey…why would you give a guy your number?
We get on Whatsapp, I try to act uninterested stating I’m not even on the market. I tell him if not for friendship then walking away would be the best thing for him to do. Guy insists. He says from the moment he saw my profile picture on Facebook, talked to me and saw how gorgeous I was; from the few pictures I sent him, he couldn’t hold it but see me walking down the isle to him!
First of all…that was the lamest line to ever use on a girl… Secondly, color me distraught! What was that? Let me be clear, even if the guy looked cute and all, that kawedding line can and shall never be used on the first online encounter.
You haven’t even met and the guy is all over you. I tried hinting to the guy how uninterested I was but he kept pushing. Then I learnt that this guy was not really in love with me but he was obsessed with me. He is among those people who might be experiencing psychological issues. Ever been in such a situation and you didn’t know what to do?
Here I’ve made a list of some easy ways to know that a guy is obsessed with you over nothing serious:
1. If he bombs you with excessive messages.
Yes communication is key but too much of it isn’t healthy. It is very normal to need an alone time and having someone texting or calling you each minute of your life might as well become a disturbance.
How do you deal with such? In this case you can confront the person. Tell them that it is good of them to check on you every time but they are overdoing it.
2. If you reject him, he gets angry or fierce.
This is a red flag ladies. If he gets angry, it certainly implies how violent he can get. People are allowed to make their own choices and a guy should not feel offended about whatever choice you make.
MORE FROM MELVINE: Here’s why IT’S OKAY to let him know you love him.
How do you deal? If he insists on having it his way, try talk to him and tell him the reasons why you’re not sailing his way. If he continues to show the weird and fierce characteristics, I guess he is not the right one for you! Block him if you can!
3. If he Stalks you.
Petty as it may seem, stalking is very serious. If he invades your privacy, follows you without your knowledge, knows whatever goes on in your personal online account and other forms of stalking, he is excessively obsessed. Tell him to stop immediately or take legal action on him if he doesn’t stop any soon.
If a person loves you they’ll let you have your private life intact. If they wish to know anything about you, they’ll definitely ask. An obsessed guy will try to put puzzles in your life together so that they can know you inside out; then manipulate you. Walk out if you realize he is an obsessed stalker!
4. If they threaten to harm or kill themselves if you don’t get into a relationship with them.
This is the worst of them. This person is definitely having psychological issues. Sadly, he needs assistance. Try talk to them how his perfect piece is somewhere else and it isn’t you. Make him understand that people get rejected every time and he doesn’t have to kill himself for it. If he fails to listen, then lose contacts with him.
5. If he insists you are his soulmate.
This might apply in a case where you have just met and he is already implying on how you complete him and he can’t do without you. For instance, the Facebook guy of mine. It is not offensive for him to throw hints here and there, that he is interested. But if he insists, it’s a red flag. Especially if on the other hand you have zero interests. In this case it is better if you explain to them that you are not interested and they should stop insisting anyways.