The ugly side of love: Expectations equal disappointments

Campus Love

What is love? A beautiful thing right? But why does it cause unbearable pain to the extent of people even killing themselves? You are somewhere seated and this handsome or pretty lady passes by.

There and then you have all sorts of fantasies and the thrill of just how perfect you’d look together leads you to approaching them. They accept an invite to a date and then you both begin to notice intolerable behaviour.

One of you can’t really handle it but the other is blinded by love and the idea of dating, so much that they assume or just accept the flaws. One of you tries to love the other more, but one is slowly drifting away because he or she had expectations that were not met.

A break follows and as one feels free, the other Is slowly dying inside and is overly suicidal.

Looking at this case scenario, expectations were not met and they eventually led to disappointments. Many a times we tend to create a picture in mind about what we expect people to be, how they should act and how to treat you as well, however, when these expectations are not met, we feel like we made a mistake and decide to walk out rather than try to work things out.

We don’t even stop to ask ourselves, what about the other person? Well, maybe as humans we have this selfish nature, but love is a matter of life and death. Statistics have it that ninety percent of all people who die by suicide have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder at the time of their death, with a good number being love related. This is frustrating as it is discouraging since we tend to associate love with powerful emotions and happiness.

At times it never about us but about the other person with us. We may want to move over to a new relationship because we feel we deserve better but it’s never a guarantee whatever we are moving into is not worse than what we had at the beginning.

We all can agree that the pain of having to watch the one you love ,love someone else is incomparable. But again it is in your power to ensure that you watch out for red lights in your relationship. These include a gradual decrease in normal conversations, calls, texts and dates.

It is easier to set yourself free before it hits you that the end has come and there’s no way back. Remember your worth and accept the situation as it is.

On the other side we should avoid having too many expectations whenever we are getting into a new relationship. At times it’s okay to just let things flow rather than try to control every step.

Good luck lovers!

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